By Andy Clerk

Dating someone with herpes might be a little off particularly to those who do not have herpes at all. But how do you exactly know if you have herpes or not? According to studies, almost 90% of herpes infected individuals do not exactly have the awareness that they already incurred the disease. Since mild herpes do not actually have symptoms, unless the outbreak comes out or you have yourself tested, this will be the only time you will know you have one.

As herpes can be transmitted in many different ways, the big question falls on this? “Is it safe to date someone with herpes”? In actual fact, dating someone with herpes requires the identification of the severity of the disease itself. Although it is awkward to ask someone concerning this type of infection, a thin line between taking heed and curing herpes and those people that do not provide treatments at all will all determine the disparities.

If someone you are dating has herpes for a long period of time and is undergoing medical treatments, doing the deed with a protection will somehow make a difference weigh against sleeping with someone who doesn’t have an inkling of having herpes and definitely is not doing anything to cure it.

Dating someone with herpes need not be a big issue. Even if this disease is tagged along with a dim-witted stigma for it being a form of a sexually transmitted disease, do you think you have laid yourself open to greater risk without the discernment between sleeping with a person curing herpes and the one who have unconsciously acquired the disease without providing any treatments at all? You choose.

Additional Reading:

Positive Single – Support site for herpes members.

By Gabe Mirkin, M.D.

One of eight North Americans (30 million) has genital herpes, even though only one in five knows that he or she has it. Herpes is classified into type I that affects primarily the mouth (”canker sores”), and type II that affects primarily the genitals, although both types can go both places. According to a study in the American Journal of Epidemiology almost one percent of North Americans acquire new cases of recurrent genital herpes each year. That’s 1,640,000 new cases of recurrent genital herpes, in 730,000 men and 910,000 women.

To get herpes, you need the virus and broken skin. Since rubbing breaks skin, sexual contact with infected partners is a frequent cause of herpes. Typically, a person develops grouped painful or itchy blisters that look like poison ivy and disappear after one to six weeks. For some, genital herpes never recur, but almost all people who have a painful first episode will have recurrent blisters in exactly the same place.

A person who has herpes can be contagious, even when there are no visible blisters. The only way to diagnose herpes is to have a culture done on a wet blister. There are no dependable blood tests to tell if you have herpes because more than 92 percent of all Americans have had herpes and therefore have positive blood tests.

Herpes is the most common cause of swelling and pain around the rectum or vagina; anyone with these symptoms should get a culture for herpes, even if they are not sexually active.

Almost all North Americans have had herpes, but only seven percent get blisters recurrently. If you have had only one bout of herpes, you do not need treatment. If you have fewer than four recurrent genital herpes attacks per year, your doctor will probably prescribe 21 500mg tablets of Famvir or Valicyclovir that you keep on hand all the time and take them at the first tingling or itching that precede an outbreak. If you have more than 4 attacks a year, your doctor will probably prescribe valicyclovir or Famivir. By the third year on that regimen, as many as 82 percent have no outbreaks at all. Taking acyclovir every day can help to prevent a person from being contagious. Valicyclovir and Famvir are both approved by the FDA for long-term use.

People with recurrent herpes can be contagious any time, but they are less likely to be contagious when they do not have blisters. Virtually everyone in North America has had herpes, but only seven percent get it recurrently. If a person with recurrent herpes is on Valtrex every day, he or she will not shed as much and not be as contagious. Personally, I would not ruin a relationship because of herpes because you are not likely to find anyone who has not had herpes.

Additional Reading:

Stop Herpes Now and From Coming Back For Good by Dr David Hoggs

Cold Sore Freedom in 3 days by Grace Melgarejo

Positive Single – Support site for herpes members.

By CD Mohatta

Does genital herpes spread through using same toilet seat? I have seen this question being asked repeatedly at various places on the Internet. Everybody is worried about getting infected with genital herpes and this fear makes people think of different ways in which they believe that they may get infected by herpes. The fear of sharing toilet seat and getting herpes originates similarly. The truth is that it is extremely difficult, rather nearly impossible to get genital herpes by sharing the same toilet seat. The virus does not survive outside body and dies quickly. The virus therefore cannot be spread by such means as sharing the same towel or the same toilet seat.

How the virus spreads-

Genital herpes is transmitted by sexual contact. If you come in sexual contact with an infected person you may get herpes. If the affected person has active lesions the chances of getting herpes increase. But many people shed the virus even if they show no outward sign of lesions. They also spread herpes. Herpes virus enters our body through mucous membrane or a cut in the skin or. The inside of mouth, inner genitals, anus, are all covered with mucous membrane.

Any activity that brings the live virus in other’s body in touch with your body may transmit herpes. In case of toilet seats and towels the virus may get transferred to them but does not remain alive. Therefore such virus is not dangerous. The virus remains alive in the body and therefore transmission from body to body causes herpes. If another object comes in-between the virus does not get transmitted, because it dies.

Additional Reading:

Stop Herpes Now and From Coming Back For Good by Dr David Hoggs

Cold Sore Freedom in 3 days by Grace Melgarejo

By Kat Samson

If you or your partner has herpes, the issue of what’s safe and what isn’t in the bedroom can be a confusing one. You will likely read all manner of different ideas and statistics on transmission rates, male versus female infection likelihood, the safety and failure rates of condoms, dental dams, and suppression therapy. The real truth is you can never be 100 percent protected from an infected partner passing herpes on to a non infected partner, but with some common sense and a little forethought before intimacy, you can drastically reduce the risk and a herpes sufferer can still enjoy a fulfilling sex life with a non infected partner.

The first thing to know about having sex during herpes outbreak is, it is not recommended. When you are having an outbreak you are much more likely to shed the virus and pass it on to your partner. Having sex between genital herpes outbreaks is much safer. However if having sex during an outbreak does not pose issues of irritation or soreness to you, or maybe your outbreaks are very frequent, or whatever reason you choose to have relations during an outbreak, here’s how you can reduce the risk.

Firstly, ensure proper protection is used. This means a well fitted condom or a strong dental dam, and be sure to check periodically to make sure it hasn’t slipped or torn during lovemaking. Condoms and dams don’t offer 100 percent protection, but can certainly reduce the risk dramatically.

Secondly, ensure the infected partner is taking a daily antiviral suppressive drug, and has kept up with dosage. These drugs reduce shedding significantly, and combined with the condom or dam, reduce the risk of transmission further.

Thirdly, remember there’s more to sex than penetration. If you are having a flare up, there’s more options for sex during herpes than just vaginal sex. Try mutual masturbation, sex toys, or if the infected partner doesn’t have oral sores, he or she can safely perform oral sex on the other partner.

Overall, remember sex during an outbreak is not recommended, and adds significant risk of transmitting the virus. However, if both partners understand the risk and take the above precautions, the risk can be reduced, and you can enjoy sex during herpes.

Additional Reading:

Stop Herpes Now and From Coming Back For Good by Dr David Hoggs

Cold Sore Freedom in 3 days by Grace Melgarejo

Positive Single – Support site for herpes members.

By Nanci Elliott

I have been conducting a tremendous amount of research on the causes of herpes outbreaks in the past few years and I am now at the point where coffee is looking like a serious culprit. I could not find any medical studies directly linking caffeine to herpes outbreaks (and as there is no money to be made from linking the two, I am not sure who would ever fund this study), I did find a significant amount of data regarding coffee and the adrenal glands.

Coffee and Exhaustion: When you drink coffee, the caffeine will begin by enhancing neuron activity in your brain. This increased neuron activity sends a message to your pituitary gland to secrete a hormone which in return, sends a message to your adrenal glands to release adrenalin. Adrenaline is an important factor in the, “fight or flight” response which puts your body under great stress. Adrenaline is very important if we are being chased in a dark alley or preparing for an athletic event, but at our work desk each morning? Not so important.

Exhaustion and Herpes Outbreaks: This constant flooding of unnecessary adrenaline, coupled with the sharp drop in adrenaline as the hormone wears off, depletes our adrenal glands and can cause fatigue, headache, irritability and/or mental confusion. Continuing with the cycle for years can leave one in a state of complete exhaustion, and it is this exhaustion that in my opinion can lead to chronic herpes outbreaks. Caffeine; where is it? I have identified coffee as a major source of caffeine but it is vital to recognize that caffeine is found in abundance in chocolate, tea (black and green), and soft drinks.

Additional Reading:

Stop Herpes Now and From Coming Back For Good by Dr David Hoggs

Positive Single – Support site for herpes members.

The biggest worry with genital herpes during pregnancy is that you might transmit it to your baby during labor and delivery. Yes, it is true that you can transmit herpes to your baby during labor and delivery if you’re contagious or “shedding virus,” then. The risk of transmission can be higher if you get herpes late in your pregnancy.

Though less commonly, you can still transmit the virus if you’re having a recurrent infection. This is because the virus remains in your body and can become reactivated if you had an outbreak.

In rare cases, a pregnant woman may transmit the infection to her baby through the placenta if she gets herpes for the first time in her first trimester. If a baby is infected this way, the virus can cause serious birth defects.

Additional Reading: Stop Herpes Now and From Coming Back For Good by Dr David Hoggs

When you come to terms with your herpes diagnosis, you’ll really need to make a decision about what treatment options you will utilize. If you are single, and intend to date people without herpes – this is doubly important.

As you know, there is no cure to the herpes simplex virus. Although the virus is not deadly or particularly dangerous – it is still incurable. Disclosing your status to any potential sexual partner is a must. There are many within the herpes community who do not feel comfortable dating outside of the “group” – however when dating people who do not have herpes, there are a few things that you can and should do to protect them.

1. Be honest about your outbreaks: Nothing ruins spontaneity like an annoying herpes outbreak! You should consider yourself highly contagious when you are experiencing an outbreak, so it is best to refrain from intercourse during these times.

2. Pay attention to your prodrome symptoms: Part of being honest about your outbreaks involves you knowing when they actually occur. Due to the fact that they aren’t always visible or noticeable – keep track of the symptoms you have immediately before an active outbreak. In other words, are your glands and lymph nodes tender? Do you have any body aches? Abnormal itching? A tingling sensation near your outbreak sites? Knowing your symptoms will give you a better idea of when you may be shedding.

3. Eat healthy: Many people with herpes report increase in outbreaks when they eat certain foods. It is widely known that things like peanuts, caffeine, and even wine can cause the dormant virus to make it’s way to the surface. If certain foods are your triggers, try to avoid them or find alternatives.

4. Take a form of suppressive therapy: We’re sure you’ve seen the cheesy Valtrex commercials – where one person in the couple has herpes, and the other person has not – and it’s been that way for years! As cheesy as they may be, there is an element in truth behind the commercial and the product itself. Studies show that when taken regularly, Valtrex drastically reduces the chances of passing the virus on to your partner. If you are dating outside of the herpes community, you should make it a point to take your meds on a daily basis as prescribed.

5. Always use protection: It is important to note that the herpes simplex virus can be passed on even when you use condoms. Since the primary form of transmission is through skin to skin contact, if you have surface level shedding in a place not covered by a condom – you are still contagious. It is also important to remind you that both genital and oral herpes can be transmitted during oral sex. With those things said, using condoms is still a “must”. Condoms combined with suppressive therapy reduce the transmission rate to less than 2-3%

Now these five tips are just a few of the ways to make dating those without herpes less stressful, the other alternative is to explore your dating options amongst the herpes community. Although the disease is still taboo and demonized, there is a rather large online dating community out there just waiting to meet you! Positive Singles is one of the premiere herpes dating sites.

Have you struggled with relationships since being diagnosed with genital herpes? Herpes doesn’t signal the end of your love life. As managing editor of YouGotHerpes.com, I give practical tips and advice on how to have a fulfilling and meaningful love life after herpes.

by: Savannah Francis

Additional Reading:

Positive Single – Support site for herpes members.

Stop Herpes Now and From Coming Back For Good by Dr David Hoggs

Cold Sore Freedom in 3 days by Grace Melgarejo

Cold sores are characterized by facial lesions on the lips or around the mouth. Their medical name is Herpes labialis and they were once considered to be a ‘kissing disease’. The news they are suffering from herpes is often very scary to a person, but they need to be aware that there are two types of herpes. Type One is typically seen above the waistline, and type two below the waistline. Therefore the cold sores around the mouth are not a good indicator of the presence of genital herpes.

Herpes Labialis is unlike a regular infection in that the appearance of facial lesions is not a result of recent exposure to Herpes germs, but rather a reactivation of some of the herpes virus that has been lying dormant in the body. These dormant virus particles may have been lying around the body inactive for some time so clearly kissing, or any other contact activity, cannot be the cause of the facial lesions that we know as cold sores.

When a person is initially exposed to the virus which causes cold sores it is known as ‘primary herpetic stomatitis’. The initial exposure can be as a result of direct contact, such as kissing. The symptoms are quite different from cold sores and include:

* Fever, headaches and irritability as well as pain when swallowing.
* Swollen gums
* Painful mouth
* Tiny blisters throughout the mouth, these will usually rupture by the third day forming ulcers.

Many people cannot remember any of these symptoms, and this is hardly surprising considering that most people who contract the virus do so before the age of seven. Even then nearly every case is ’subclinical’, meaning it is never serious enough to be referred to a doctor, so is allowed to run it’s course(usually an infection lasts 10-14 days) and then forgotten.

Roughly 80% of the population is thought to carry the primary herpetic stomatitis antibody. The body only produces the antibody in defense against the virus itself, and in all cases once the virus is present particles will remain. Of that 80% however, only a small number(about one third) will have the virus reactivate and get cold sores. Some of the triggers which can serve to reactivate the virus are:

* When the victim is emotionally upset or under stress.
* Physical stress, tiredness or fatigue.
* Recent illness such as a cold or flu.
* Damage to the lips or skin, including severe chapping, sun or wind burn.
* Changes in hormone levels such as those seen during menstruation or pregnancy
* A deficiency in the immune system

In other words an outbreak is more likely to occur whenever the bodies immune system is working sub-optimally or has been heavily taxed fighting off another problem.

Beverley A Brooke

Stop Herpes Now and From Coming Back For Good by Dr David Hoggs

Positive Single – Support site for herpes members.

Cold Sore Freedom in 3 days by Grace Melgarejo

Dating with herpes can be very stressful, and as you know – stress is the last thing you need because it can cause those outbreaks! Because of this, many single people with herpes have purposely reduced themselves to a life of celibacy and shy away from new relationships. Just because you’re infected with oral or genital herpes, that does not mean that you need to lead the life of a hermit crab!

An estimated fifty million adults in America are infected by the herpes simplex virus and the wide majority of them do not know. This blissful ignorance is the reason why herpes is the fastest growing sexually transmitted diseases amongst young adults. Now chances are those stats don’t make you feel any better about your situation, but it is important to realize that you are not alone. Although you should not feel limited to dating strictly within the herpes community, doing so is a great way to help eliminate some of the stresses you may feel when you think about dating people who do not have herpes.

Thanks to the resourcefulness that the internet provides, there are online dating and personal sites for just about everyone under the sun. Be you white, black, tall, short, Jewish or Christian, there’s a dating website that caters to you. This same thing goes for people infected with oral and genital herpes! Yup, there are dozens of herpes dating websites.

PositiveSingles, MPwH and STDDate are amongst the most popular. They provide a safe place for people with the virus to come together and interact without fear of judgment or ridicule. No matter what you decide to do, just don’t take yourself out of the dating game. Don’t allow the disease to take away your opportunity for love.

Have you struggled with relationships since being diagnosed with genital herpes? Herpes doesn’t signal the end of your love life. As managing editor of YouGotHerpes.com, Savannah Francis gives practical tips and advice on how to have a fulfilling and meaningful love life after herpes. For the best tips on dating with herpes, visit us today at Herpes  dating sites.

By Savannah Francis

Additional Reading:

Stop Herpes Now and From Coming Back For Good by Dr David Hoggs

Positive Single – Support site for herpes members.